About youth love

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First love not only inspires and encourages person, she paints in the new color of his Life. You remember, your sixteen-year-old daughter was always gloomy, closed, angry, no one talked. And suddenly: what about it? Was a fun, lively, kind, soft, heart, in all agreeing with you... You did not understand the reasons, and she fell in love with a passionate, hot, as happens in my youth. And what's next? And further: it was better to learn every thing in her hands is easily and beautifully. It aims to help you become friendly with people.
Is it bad?
Of course you will say that it is not always so. Anything can happen, and Vice versa.
This is undeniable. Indeed, you do not worry in vain, seeing that the son is constantly sighs, silent, refuses to eat, not sleep at night, and sometimes rises and writes something... Wanting to get to the cause, you cede the elementary norms of ethics and read what is written... You think that this goodness knows what, and certainly not something terrible, maybe even vulgar... And what? It is only poems, but not just the lyrics, and their own compositions. And poems about It. In them glorify and nose, and eyes, and even boyish haircut lady young heart!
"A fool,laughing, you say.- Well that he, in fact... and why is he Tamara, the ones you know from the distant days of kindergarten? Because he never thought it was not!".
Your son is difficult, very difficult. Perhaps his sense unanswered? Maybe he is afraid to tell about it, and hides himself? Anyway, try to understand his condition and do your best not to insult vulnerable during this period the soul. Perhaps he will decide and tell Tamara about your feeling. Perhaps it will pass. But in fact, in both the case of extreme danger from his heart feelings can't be.
The first feeling, as a rule, chastely, poetic, purely. This feeling, perhaps, cannot be called true love, because it is not connected with the feelings arising in physical intimacy more than adults. This is the first feeling can more accurately be called friendship-love. About this feeling of well-said A. I. Herzen in his work "Past and thoughts... "I don't know, " he writes, " why give some monopoly memories of first love over the memories of a young friendship, First love because so fragrant that she forgets gender differences, that she is passionate friendship. For his part, the friendship between the young men has all the warmth of love, and the whole nature, the same shy fear to touch the word of his feelings, the same distrust of himself, unconditional devotion, the same excruciating anguish of separation and the same jealous desire exclusivity".
Watching the appearance and development of the first feeling your grown-up children, try to help them deal with him, to be saved from premature sexual intercourse so as long as you can continue the beauty of pure friendship. Make love, your children kept their loyalty to friendship and the desire to implement its requirements. "Friendship without love can be, and love without friendship - chalk",- said Nikolai Ostrovsky's novel "How the steel was tempered".
The best methods of educational work of parents with young men will certainly are not sharp concise judgment, order, injunction, and tactful and soft participation in their experiences, talk (better first indirect, with reference to the lives of others) on friendship, love, good and bad sides relationships, personal example of friendly communication between father and mother, approval noble attitude to your loved one, tactful condemnation wrong.
A. S. Makarenko was a supporter of conversations parents with children of school age on the matters of love. He believed that speaking with your son or daughter about sexual life, it is necessary to emphasize its dependence on love and educate the young men and women deep respect to all these issues, respect for civil, aesthetic and human.