About the education of shame

Sex education in the context of the family provides for the development of shame of the children of different sex. Modesty is important as a moral form of a man - is the ability to behave in society with dignity, modesty and restraint. Modesty is the basis of chastity - inner purity and beauty of the person. Apparent modesty in words and manners of a person, his ability to dress, his gait, gestures, actions. Raising this important quality you must start as early as possible, creating favorable conditions in the family.
Unfortunately, not all parents give due importance to this, at first sight, trifles, as the appearance in the home environment. My mother bewildered why her fourteen-year-old son so intently at her looks? And there is nothing surprising. Look at the appearance of this mother - Bathrobe her buttoned only half: the upper part of fasteners spoiled. From this highly exposed Breasts. And the Pope is very casually buttoned his home pants. "You will think! - tell Papa and Mama.- We're home!". But at home the children. Seeing this, they themselves with age become careless, lose their sense of shame.
Often adults don't think about why young girls no modesty and humility. Adult indignant, make observations young, whispering to each other, and sometimes their eyes away. Often in the summer time in a crowded subway car or cabin trolley during peak hours you can see the young girls in deep decalcomania dresses. You can often meet and setting girls, who are naked legs far above the knees. The narrow and short dress out of place in a formal setting institutions, transport and even in the store.
Looking at these girls, adult their eyes away. And boys? While teenagers? On the contrary, they try to take a closer look, to approach, to touch. The increased interest to representatives of the other sex, peculiar to them, and the lack of proper sex education in the family and, as a consequence, shame excites the imagination, awakens early sexual feeling and often pushes rash acts. In these cases, say, acquaintance began with a physical attraction. Unfortunately, it ends due to the fact that this desire disappears, leaving a particular track, feelings of remorse. It turns out that it is no shame can cause shallow and fragile relations.
Of course, as not to resent such a light behavior of young people, as not to criticize them! And if you think more seriously, if you look carefully? Why girl wants to dress up like that? Would her parents do not see where inappropriate as she goes on the street, don't bother them its desire to wear things catchy, vibrant, trendy? Unfortunately, these issues concern not all parents.
Without thinking seriously about the correct sexual education of their children, not attaching much importance to their appearance, they not only did not hamper emerging negative desire of children, but contribute to their development.
"My daughter is a true fashionista,is sometimes said mother.- To think that I'm in her years was much more modest and not something to wear, had never seen such things, what has it. Yes, I would not have dared to wear in those years such a short dress, such stockings... And now it's not so, children are not the same. And because behind the others do not want. "I'm not a woman, " says indignantly me daughter, " now all are so...". Here and buy her Chichi things are sutured already short skirt...".
You may think, perhaps, that we are talking about quite a grown-up girl! But it is not. This mother's daughter is only 15 years old! And as soon as she takes off school uniform and wear a house dress, it immediately becomes older, more affected and trying to speak easily.
Raise a decent, modest person is the task of each family. The success of its solution depends on the correct parental attitude to sexuality education. A. S. Makarenko said that in educational every detail, it's all important.
Education shame cannot be regarded as a trifle. This is a serious party sex education. Begins with it the establishment of a strong sense of respect, chastity in relation to another floor.
Since childhood the child observes that belong to each other, the father and mother, gentle whether they modest or cut and rough.
Can it be considered normal when the mother is constantly washes her son is a student in the bathroom or asks him to help her wash her back? Can it be considered a trifle things parents, have some fun in fine summer day the games their children, completely naked? Obviously, these parents believe that in four of the baby is no question about the peculiarities of appearance of his girlfriend... They begin to regret their naive idea of the issues of sex when their baby suddenly asked: "why do Nadi not all the way from me?" Further, in process of growth and development of the child they will verify an increased interest in the girl... Surely this can happen when raising conditions will constantly promote the development of sexual interest.
What are these conditions? First of all, the inability of parents to show modesty, the gracefulness of their feelings. Kissing, cuddling, fondling, taking place in front of the child, cause his first interest, and then the desire to imitate, to learn something new yourself.
It is extremely important to protect the child, not only from the contemplation of such scenes, but mainly from the most intimate moments in the life of the spouses. The adolescents in the stage of puberty, especially wary behave. They are concerned about the slightest night whisper, a whisper, they seek to understand many unclear moments.
Some parents say that their children at night restless sleep their intermittent and mild, they try to listen to what occurs in adults.
No shame from his father and mother and care for normal sexual development of the child leads to increased sexual interest in children, making it the dominant and Intrusive. One of the conditions that hinder the development of modesty is wrong organization of life and rest of children in the family. Especially bad when parents allow children to sleep with them in the same bed.
These young people reported unusually early puberty and as a result - increased sexual interest and associated changes in mental development: the prevalence of emotional experiences, the lack of attention and interest in the training sessions, games and others, the unbalance of nervous processes, weak will. It is proved that under the wrong conditions of family education creates a favorable ground for premature Mature children, to unhealthy interests and aspirations, and misperceptions about the relationship between people and so on, in Other words, there are conditions under which blossom quality, opposite modesty, humility, which is the important elements of the concept of "dignity".
To develop the child modesty, it means properly educate sexual feeling.
In the book of the writer-doctor centuries Veresaev "notes of a doctor", said, "Modesty is not a relic of barbarism, and valuable acquisition of culture".